Experience on the train to Warsaw

First the train was one hour delayed. And it started pouring.

Most conductors don't speak English. So the first cart I got on the conductor took my interail ticket and I thought he would just check it and give back. But he was to keep it so I asked. Then he impatiently said three time "ticket tomorrow, ticket tomorrow, ticket tomorrow!" So I didn't know what to do so went into my cabin. The cabin was quite crowded with four people already inside and all of them were speaking Polish. So I asked the young ones if they spoke english and thankfully they did. They were very nice to me and helped me out a lot. Although the first thing they asked was very crucial. So they asked me where I was going then I told them Warsaw. They exchanged looks and asked "Are you sure you are on the right train?" So I freaked out. "Or I mean the right wagon?" shhhh, I was a bit more relieved. "What do you mean? aren't all the wagons going to the same places?" "No, they split up to three parts when it crosses the border." Then I realized that all of them were going to Krakow and I was the only one going to Warsaw. So they suggested me to go to the conductor and asked. So it turned out that I had to move to some other cabin. and I thanked them for being so helpful and kind and learned how to say thank you in Polish. Actually I realized not long after that what Borat says right before he goes off to some place is exactly that. Chinkui or however you spell it. anyhow, So I went back and forth trying to find the right cart. I asked so many conductors and no one spoke English. I even went on one that was so second world warish with Russian letters written all over it. and I was pretty sure the conductor was either speaking Russian or Ukrainian to me. Then I realized that one was going to split to go to Kiev. But finally I settled down in one of the nice cabins with this mother and daughter. The daughter studied in Brighton, England so her english was perfect. We chatted a bit then finally it was too difficult cuz the beds were too tight together that I couldn't hold the same posture for longer so all of us went to bed.

Iceland-Copenhagen-Berlin funny stories

Christian and I at the central station

Mette and I at her place

view from Mette's bathroom

Copenhagen's famous hippie area- Christiania

Waking up quarter to five in the morning isn't exactly the thing you wanna do in the morning. Especially when your friend's flight is leaving at 7 and yours is actually at 9 but delayed till 10. Anyhow, that's exactly what happened with me and Christophe. Usually im fairly quick on getting ready but this morning I was slightly slower, and, although Christophe didn't point out, his face told me that you should hurry the fuck up or im gonna kill you.

Anyhow, there wasn't much action until I got on the plane to Copenhagen. Before boarding I got a message from Christophe saying how cool looking his plane was, but he didn't describe in words so it was hard to picture. I basically slept the whole way except for being woken up for breakfast. Breakfast? usually European airlines don't have meals during the flight but I guess you could almost consider Iceland America so...

After meeting up with Mette we strolled on the streets and finally to Christiania where I had almost gone to but the friend I had traveled with didn't wanna get in because she was afraid that she was going to get mugged. But actually it was quite peaceful inside until a bunch of cops came and the crowd just started throwing rocks at them. Most people inside there were stoned, and you know stoned people aren't that aggresive. So we had some beers there, catching up a little, Oh yeah, now Mette is working as a life guard at some beach. She doesn't really have to do much but sitting in the chair, reading, playing on the computer, or something else. And she used to have the craziest laugh you could ever imagine but now since she's quitting smoking pot you can barely hear it.

After that, we went grabbed some indian food and went back to her apartment to drink some more beers and talked about life in general. The discussion went on about how it is hard for Asian guys to take the inititives to talk to other people of different races. She confirmed me that I was doing a great job, well I think as well.

So I said good bye to her the next morning before she went to work and went downtown. I had been searching for the city bike the day before but without any success. But today I had luck. I spotted a chick parking one just outside a shop so went up and took it. So I was on my bike all day till I met up with Christian. He seems to be doing fairly well except for the fact that he still needed inspiration for his thesis. so we caught up, talking about sports a lot, Oh yeah, I was wearing a RED SOX shirt that day so when he came from behind he just shouted, RED SOX suck!! which I didn't agree so much on. But surprisingly enough, despite growing up in Denmark Christian is a big fan in baseball, american football, well and also soccer. And he supports ITALY!?!?! But I actually had a nice surprise for him since I couldn't bring my vodka on board since I was not going to check in any luggage, I gave my Smirnoff to him.

But here comes the funny part
So I arrived at the airport and was trying to check in with the self service machines. But none of them recognized my reservation. So I thought it was just some techinical difficulties with the computers so I went to the counter to check in.
After checking my flight and stuff, the staff told me: "I know why I can't find you in the system... your flight is tomorrow... and the checkin is closing in five minutes so you have to be quick if you wanna change the flight. And you have to go all the way down that way to the customer service center to make changes." So I sprinted there and changed my flight and stuff. It costed me about 50 euros to do so... But I thought," I already told the friends in Berlin and Copenhagen that I am coming tonight so I'd better just fly tonight."

At the security check, actually I didn't tell you that I also had a smaller water bottle of whisky on me. And also I had two bottles of contact solution which I didn't know you could carry on the plane. So right before the check, I put the bottle of whisky right to my stomach and the two bottles of solution between my thighs. so I looked kinda chubby at the crotch. so I took everything out of my pockets as instructed. and successfully went through the security gate but the guard on the other side had a smirk on his face saying "you're not fooling anybody..." because at this moment I already had the bottle head sticking out behind my shirt almost like I was black and had a huge boner. So I just tell myself "who am I kidding..." and took out everything underneath my clothes. And after I took them all out they asked me again if I had anything else, well of course I said no. As the security were checking my bagpack one female one asked me why didn't just put the solutions on the tray because they could go through. I said I didn't know. Then she pulled out a huge bag of white washing powder out of my bagpack and questioned what it was. It was one of the funniest moments of my life- a huge bag of coccaine looking powder right in front of me. I was, for a moment, so worried that I would get arrested because of this bag. But I tried to sound as calm as possible so they wouldn't get all suspicious. "It's washing powder for laundry, you could smell it if you want." "I could smell it from here already," and she gave me a smile.

So I finally went through the security and got on the plane, although I almost missed the plane because of the check too....

After all these disasters, I ended up at Hauptbahnhof(central station) in Berlin. I sent out a message to Viviana who I was supposed to stay with. After a while when I was walking around in the central station, for some strange reason, a very hot blonde waved to me. So I said hi, but didn't know her intension so had this weird look on my face. I think that might have lowered my ability to think because after one hour I still ddin't get the message from Viviana and then I realized I told her that I was coming tomorrow!!! I was so stupid because I had everything planned out but I just screwed it up in my own fucking stupid stinking head! So I got the message from her saying that she's living quite far and would take one hour to get here. So I texted another friend to come to get me since he lived much closer. And he showed up after 15 minutes with two bikes. So finally problem solved...

Iceland in brief

me in action at night

Christopheat at Geysir

the Blue lagoon

clear lake water in Iceland

This is the border between the Eurasian plate and the American plate

Iceland... hmm... where do I begin?

Let's get to the chase where it's interesting.

Well, the summary of this trip would be seeing beautiful landscape, lots of whale watching, 24-7 sunlight, a lot of jaccuzi and hot tubs, and the ass- technique.

I know all these sound very exciting and I will get to detail just in a minute.

But Christophe and I spent most of the time in the hot tubs, jaccuzis, hot springs, etc.
In the city of Reykyavik, they have 7,8 city thermal swimming pools and lots of other facilities along with them, for instance, water slides!! We have gone into the pools three times within the first two days cuz we wanted to do what the Romans do u know.

That's when Christophe invented the ass technique, which is required for sliding in full speed on the water slides. This means that you basically have to expose most of your ass to be in contact with the slide. if this is not done, you probably would reach the bottom faster by crawling on the slide. But anyhow, it was funny to show ass to the people behind you right before you go off. I think my ass is still quite pleasant to see but some people's got a hairy one.

We also met two cool people from the pool. One was a 82 year old grandma living in Iceland for 60 years but was born and raised in Florida. It was funny cuz we thought old people couldn't speak English in Iceland so me and Christophe were always talking shit in front of the elder. Fortunately, we didn't talk much in front of this lady but she just started chatting with us while we were sitting in the same hot tub as her. She spoke English so fluently that I was shocked, especially with a southern accent. But then she explained herself so that all made sense. She comes to the pool every other day to swim 1000m in the morning in the past 20 years. that is just amazing. I think she said that when Christophe only swam 200m and came all tired, but I am not the one to talk cuz I did zero. Although I could argue that I didn't have the goggles.

And the other interesting person we ran into was when Christophe and I were talking of this word STRAX from the telecom at the pool, it means LATER in dutch, so the girl next to him interrupted us and said it means Right Now in Icelandic. Well actualy it means the same in Swedish as well but we didnt know. So we started chatting with her and noticed that she had some ankle protection on. So I asked what happened. Then we found out that she's actually a professional soccer goalie in Iceland and is the starting goalie on the national women's team. So we chatted with her for a long while. And a few days after we regret that we didn't ask for her autograph or anything, not even the name. Cuz it would have been cool if we could party with the whole national women's team. So we saw a passerby and asked him if he knew who the goalie of the national team is. Then he told us fairly quickly because he actually went to school with her. But he couldnt tell us the last name because all the girls have the almost the same last name in Iceland ending with dottir (for instance, andersdottir, meaning anders' daughter).

anyhow, now of course we cannot neglect the details on the geysirs and the landscape. We went on a tour- the golden circle which took us to the most famous landscapes of Iceland. it involved one of the biggest waterfalls in Europe but i thought it was the biggest until I learned that there was a bigger one in the north of Iceland. The tour guide was one of the worst I have ever met. Nice guy, but he spoke English word by word as if he'd had to look up every word he spat out in the dictionary. Some Englishmen described him as a five year old reading a book to a class. we all thought he was just a nice guy who didn't really speak english that fluently until this Austrialian girl told us when she was asking him a question, he only stared at her tits and was totally blanked out from the question. And the most funny thing he said was every mispronouced version of the word "city," he said "shitty." So according to him, Christophe and I went back to the shitty hostel at the end.

Speaking of whales. Bad experiences. First the real whale watching took place after a night out, which means seasickness. I had such a seasickness that I just wanted to ignore any whale in sight. We saw probably some whales including the humpback, and minke whales. But the real whale experience came that night when me and Christophe tried about 20 bars/clubs and only one was filled with hot blondes while the rest were full of whales. I am not insulting them but you would agree with me if you see them for yourself. And It's ridiculously painful when somebody stepped on your foot by one of the whales. So that was quite a disappointment.

I think the night before was better cuz I went out with all the roommates, two aussie girls, one german, one gay guy from san francisco, and Christophe. It would have been so funny to watch myself cuz I was totally drunk outa my ass and at first we were at a gay club. Christophe tried to tell me because Ian (guy from San Fran) got picked up at the gay club. But I was just falling asleep dancing and everytime somebody touched me I came live and started dancing like a maniac again. And that would go on for another five minutes or so then I fell back asleep standing. So I did that for the rest of the night and I was dancing to this one girl who seemed to be interested in me also. But I just fell asleep for a few seconds and the moment I woke up she was already taken. And all the roommates were like WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TIM?!?!

Crazy night out

Since it's my, Romain's and Behnam's last night out in Stockholm we decided to go out early.

And for the same reason, I suited up in my blazer as Christophe had told me so much good about it.

So we went to this club called Huset, which I have never been to, at 10:30pm, because the beers were cheap before 11pm.

It wasn't as crowded as I expected, but that's a good thing. Although it was way too damn hot inside.

Good thing about the club is that it was filled with girls and not as many guys, and the girls were mostly pretty hot.

So few things funny happened in this night.

first Behnam told me when we had the thanksgiving dinner I was very drunk so when his corridormate's dad entered the corridor I yelled "DADDY'S HOME!!!!", which I denied since I was not that drunk that night and even if I was, I remember all the things that happen during my "unconsciousness."

Then after a while me and Romain went outside trying to talk with some girls. The first girl we picked was a total Bimbo. The second thing she asked was You should buy me a drink. she didn't even say please or anything. typical Stureplan girl in our term.

So after that Romain was still trying to talk to her but I saw no point. So I went in again on the dance floor. It was crowded as before.

After a while one of my nostrils felt wet so I touched it. It was blood. You Gotta Be Kidding ME! bloodynose right in the middle of a club? But it wasn't that bad so I stayed at the dancefloor and try to sniff it in everytime it was coming out. and at the end it clogged so didnt matter. Although it came back again so it wasn't that pleasant.

Dancing on the dancefloor as usual I was looking over all the faces there and suddenly my eyes met with a girl on the little platform in the front. And she stared at me for a while then came off the platform, talked with her friend, and started moving to the music. I knew there was something going on so went over and grind with her for a while before she told me something in swedish and went out the door. I think she said something like I'll be back or something because when I searched for her after a while and she saw me, she immediately gave her purse to her friend next to her and grind with me again. So then I could not let this chance slip outa my hand.

I asked her if she wanted to go to somewhere more quiet so we could talk. Then we chatted for a while and I faced one crisis. She asked me if I had a girl friend I said no. And I asked the same to her she said yeah she had a boyfriend. Lightning strikes.
"BUT HE's in the ARMY right now..."
what does that imply?
what exactly does she want from me?

But after a while we just chatted about bullshit, then she wanted to exchange numbers. because she needed to leave with her friends.

After that I went back to the dancefloor and I thought I got accidentally poked. But then the poking came again so I turned. It was this blonde chick who did that and she gave me a thumb-up. I was like....

But later on I ran into the blonde again and I wasn't sure if it was the same one. But according to Romain she wanted to dance with me. But I was already content enough with one phone number. You know I am very easy to pleased :P

But then these two hottest blond chicks I have ever seen took over the floor. many guys tried to dance with them but couldn't handle their hotness. that included PJ. Samy told me they were too hot for him. Let me describe how they looked.

Perfect faces
perfect boobs
perfect bottoms
black dresses whose skirt is only enough to cover their panties. (but actually it didnt because when they went down on some guys the panties were entirely shown.)


Anyway, it was fun to watch them dance, and quite arousing as well.
One of the guys dancing with them had a piece of ice in his mouth and passed it on to one of the hot girls' mouth. then she did the same to the other girl, then to the guy. Then the guy was about to pass it to the other guy but the other chickened out. After quite some persuasion the other guy finally agreed to "make out."

Actually before all this I was going to sleep because I felt a bit sick so I felt asleep for 5 minutes in my own bed and Romain rang me. I had the phone on vibrate so usually if I was asleep I wouldn't feel the vibrate. But tonight, something amazing happened. I opened my eyes and was not tired at all after five minutes of sleep. I knew something fun was going to happen. Besides, Behnam was about to leave the day after so I'd better get my ass outa my room.

But all this ended really quick when everyone got fed up with the music inside and empty dancefloors. I walked home alone from the T-bana and the sky started to get cloudy and gloomy. BANG! thunder stroke. And I saw the lightening ripping the sky into halves. And when I got to my building door, there was this huge garbage can in the way keeping the door open. For our own safety I removed it and shut the door behind me. little did I know, the next morning I would find out from a corridor mate that the glass on the door was smashed entirely splattering on the ground. And the reason for that seems only to be the nonworking key.